Tuesday, July 16, 2013

A Few Things That Parents of Special Needs Kids Shouldn't Feel Guilty About

I read a very encouraging blog this morning and with her permission, I'm blog lifting from her post. I’ve mixed her ideas with some of my own as well as some direct quotes from her. You can read more of her stuff HERE.

  • Taking a break. I think for the most part, Sarah is pretty easy to take care of but she does require a fair amount of one on one attention and lots of it. She needs to be watched constantly as she lacks the judgement to be safe or to make appropriate decisions. I have found great comfort in the respite care that I've found for her and the time allows me to do other things that I might not otherwise be able to. This was a huge step for me to overcome as I tend to think I can do it all. Thankful for the wisdom of someone who encouraged me to take time for myself.
  • Thinking that you "caused" your child's disabilities. I'll admit, this one touches close to home. I know in my heart that nothing I did caused Sarah’s delays and that the suspected oxygen deprivation early in my pregnancy wasn’t my fault. I play and replay in my mind all the suspects from the pregnancy and even beyond, wondering if anything I did differently would have changed. Probably not. 
  • Giving up on redirecting or reminding your child. Whether it's your child's persistent banging of knees against the kitchen table or humming, at times you run out of strength to say, "Stop!" Go on, flee to another room or let your significant other deal. You can't always be on.” ~Ellen~
  • Letting her zone out to the TV/iPad. I don’t really want her to spent insane amount of time in front of a screen but sometimes it’s necessary for survival. Mine and hers. 
  • Spilling to your friends. If they are good friends, they'll be there to listen to you angst about your child and give you perspective, just as you are there for them. ~Ellen
  • Writing about your child with special needs. I write so that I have a record of what I’ve done or have yet to do. It’s therapeutic for me to do it like this and even if I encourage one person, then I’ve met my goal. I also write for awareness of delays, microcephaly and cerebral palsy. I will admit though, sometimes I wonder if people really want to hear more or not...

1 comment:

  1. Yeah, I sometimes feel guilty for causing Silas' problems too. If we had noticed he wasn't breathing sooner, might things have been different?



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